How we cling to the truths that we want to believe. Even when things are so wrong that nothing functions as it should, we still cling to hope, to life, to something more than we have. It’s a strange affliction which pervades us all, no matter ones constitution. The only difference being that some people act on their stirrings, while others hide them away; asleep, comfortably somnolent in the afternoon sun.
It matters not how you choose, for choice comes at the expense of knowing. That is to say, you don’t have choice. Thoughts arise, and you respond, but is that really choice? You didn’t choose the thought, though you did react to it. The reaction part is the free will in the equation, though really much like a limited answer question, there is no real choice. I guess we all live in reaction.
My outlook on life has changed since the practical realisation that thoughts are no more under my control, than the dreams I have in deep sleep. My choices are better these days, though limited, as I can see them pass by in meditation. Much like clouds – though I prefer the idea of a puffing billy – billowing smoke out. A stream of thoughts being left behind as soon as they arise. And slowly disappearing.