Saw a friend today, who I haven’t seen in a long time. Friend? well, someone I have known anyway. Both of our lives have changed radically since we last saw each other. We locked into a conversation about the need to be oneself. And how sometimes being with someone else doesn’t allow you to be yourself. And how then it comes down to how much of a compromise are you willing to make. We talked about how the need to feel free and travel, to live your life to the full. Also the need to have a base; a feeling of belonging. And of love.
I didn’t know her that well really, but got to know her much better today. I was happy for her. Happy that she was making her way. Her way, not some pretend way that so many of us are doing. I look forward to sinking more into myself, and seeing where it takes me. I have a ways to go as yet. I have a splinter within me that tweezers can’t seem to reach. It may be that it will always be there, not hidden, nothing is hidden. And I do not pretend that it is. Fuck another smoking Bjork track. [ I have always loved it on the album ]
I am always saying that nothing stays the same. And I would have to say it’s the only constant in my life. NOTHING stays the same! Everything in your life will be gone one day. Given enough time nothing will remain. So what is it, that we are all so busy doing? Is rushing around and stressing out, doing all that stuff that we tell ourselves is really so important, actually important. For the life of me, I can’t see anything more important that the passing moment. We just fill our time, probably through the programming of school etc, doing things. We never stop. It’s weird, well I think it is.